no more blogger...

Thanks to Todd Phillips, my new blog site is JacksonBohlender.com, and it looks way better. Check it out! I'll be uploading photos, videos and such soon to make it a real multimedia center.

I won't be updating this blog anymore, you'll have to go to JacksonBohlender.com to see my thoughts now, so update your Rolodexes (or would that be "Roledi"?)

Thanks, Todd!

FSM?

I just found another Forerunner School of Ministry online. What are the odds of another group of people choosing the same name for their bible school as we did? The name itself isn't all that catchy. You can't say it fast, it's wordy, and it's ambiguous. Huh...

I don't think they copied IHOP, though, because judging from their website, it looks like a bigger and older school than FSM-KC.

the blob

Shot and produced by yours truly on sight at Waukaway Springs in Mississippi, here are two videos of blob launching... one of my dad trying to launch Grayson (it didn't work too well), and then one of Jason launching my dad, which was a little more successful.

click here to see Grayson's launch...

click here to see Dad's launch...

Last night was our second night at Great Wolf Lodge, andnot a very restful night at that. I had the brilliant idea of redeeming one of our many free coffee coupons at the Starbucks downstairs. The problem was, it was already 9:30 pm. This provided for a caffeine-induced energy spree, which provided for a restless night. Well,
"restless" is putting it mildly.

I kept thinking about how I wished I had a feather duster right by my side to snuggle and take home and call it my own. Then I envisioned the lifeless bodies of birds whose feathers had been plucked in order to get me the said feather duster. And then I started feeling bad, so I thought about the End-Times, and staring into the blinking "12:01" on our hotel room's microwave oven's screen, I thought of how if the antichrist could just build a big microwave oven, then he could nuke a lot in a little time.

And then I started considering the possibilities of becoming a science major, but then I decided I didn't like science. And then I thoughtfully pondered the kids in Somalia who you can't even talk to for less then $20 (It's $23.99 - trust me. I know these things.) and they would love to learn science but can't because nobody in their rural village know how to get a science book in their native language. And then I decided to get a degree in science when I'm older, but to learn everything in whatever the native language in Somalia is.

It was an endless line of meaningless thought. And that's how I spent my evening. There is a moral to this story, folks - caffiene'll kill ya.

a song...

I've kind of pieced together from other songs I've written....

I ate of this world and I became of it,
the light I thought I was living for
was a glimpse of darkness.

but it's a new day,
and it's a new hour
I'm so grateful for your mercies,
they descend like spring showers

I've forsaken this world
and I've partaken of your blood
and now my sins are washed away, my sins are washed away
because I'm covered by blood of the Lamb, my sins are washed away.

And as I sing this song, I feel undeserving of my destiny.
And as I gaze upon your splendor, I feel unworthy of your Word.
You are my rock and my redeemer, you are worthy of my praise.

my apologies to Ali Mohommad Ghedi, prime minister of Somalia. Mr. Ghedi, I didn't mean to make that long distance call...

God's been talking to me about simplicity lately. I feel like I've been storing up treasures on earth. I feel like I've been treasuring my computer and cell phone and computer more than I've treasured my relationship with Jesus. (now, if you were planning on getting rid of a MacBook Pro, I'd still be willing to take it off your hand for you, because I've learned my lesson.)

I've been using my computer a little too much not only doing FSM homework, which takes up most of my time on my iBook, but surfing. Let me tell you, folks, every stinking iPod on eBay sells for what it's worth. There's no use watching them. Take it from someone with experience in this field.

I've been using my cell phone a little too much not only just for the telephone feature, but for text, picture, and video messaging. (which is free with our cellular plan - it gets better).

The postman graciously brought the T-Mobile bill to our doorstep the other day and we were suprised to see that my phone was charged 24 more dollars for a call to Somalia. That's right - Somalia. I don't know anyone in Somalia, and I deifinitely haven't called anyone there. Heck, I didn't even know they had telephones in Somalia.

The only thing I can trace it back to is a time I let Zion play with my phone and I thought I had locked the keypad. This whole thing has left me with two conclusions: 1) being that debt stinks, and 2) that I have to be responsible with the stuff the Lord has given me.

room evaluation

Our hotel room provided decent lodging for the night, but if we were to have paid big money, I'd want it back. Maybe its yuckiness comes from the fact that it's not in the nicest area of town. All I know is that it's just plain uncomfortable sleeping in a hotel room where they keep a 12-gauge shotgun in the nightstand drawer* next to the Bible and the Book of Mormon. Ah, the bare essentials.

I won't be blogging from the camp due to a lack of WiFi. Expect reports on the way back.


*I may have exaggerated a tad. The 12-gauge shotgun was more like a small bottle of pepper spray to protect yourself from Fire-in-The-Nighters at the International House of Burglary...

War and Peace

I've placed a hold on Leo Tolstoy's War and Peace, because according to my parents, it's like the 500-page book. Now, mind you, I won't read it, but I'll carry it around and put in in conspicuous places to make it look like I'm reading it, and then I'll walk down the road and people will point and say, "There goes young Jackson Bohlender, the noble and wise boy who reads 500-page novels for light bedtime reading."

And then, all I have to do to get into college is plan a meeting with the president of my chosen school and casually mention that I have War and Peace checked out at the library and he'll say, "By golly, son, you've got yourself a scholarship! Any boy who reads 500-page novels for light bedtime reading deserves his way paid to school."

And that's my plan for college, so Mom and Dad, all that money you put away every year for college, you can go on a shopping spree now, because I've got everything mapped out for the future.

baking injury...

I'm kind of on a cookie-making spree. I like doing it, because you take something totally disgusting-looking (cookie dough) and make it into a rather attractive piece of art that people can take home and look at and hang up on their wall. Or they can gobble it up, whatever their preferences.

Anyway, I was on Batch #27 this evening and got a little too close to the side of the oven, thus leaving a minor burn on my arm. It stings a bit, but now, I have this really impressive welt that people will look at and ask what happened, and I'll proudly proclaim as manly as I can, "Cookie-making injury."

My mom and I have also discovered that if we aplit a cookie, each taking a half, we can easily have 2 cookies a piece, but it always looks like we're having a half. Oh, shoot. Now my secret's out. Sorry, Mom! :-D

Missippi

We leave for Mississippi tomorrow, (and yes, I know how to spell Mississippi!) and we get to rent a car because our current vehicle is over 150,000 miles and acts kind of scary from time to time.

My dad says he's going to try to upgrade like we did last time we rented a car - we went from 7-seater Town and Country minivan to a 9-seater Excursion for only a few more bucks a day, and boy was it worth it. The SUV was the size of a school bus. It was beautiful, because most of the time, I got an entire row to myself. Ah, the glory of leg room.

I've got to go pack right now. Later, taters...

USA Today: 22 States Likely to Restrict Abortion if Roe is Overturned

Take a few minutes to look at the chart below. 49% of America is saying that they are willing to ban abortion. This is huge. However, we need to pray for the other pro-choice 35% and the 16% of apathists.


click here to see the whole article...

Will someone kindly explain this to me?

Every time I turn my cell phone on and it's within 6 feet (I measured it) of my alarm clock radio, my alarm clock makes weird buzzing noises, andthe closer the phone is to the radio, the louder the buzzing. The radio part of the alarm clock is off, though, and even if it was on, its volume control dial is turned all the way down. hmm...

If anyone can find out, there will be a reward... in heaven.

hmm.

Something I do not understand...

Why is it an insult when people say "your mom"? I mean, I love my mother, (she's the best one I've ever had) but it seems that it would be easier to just insult my face or my out-of-proportion abodiminal area. Why my mom?

It makes no sense. "Your mom is so old she went to school with Ronald Reagan". Wouldn't it be more insulting to tell me that I was old? Or maybe they just want to semiinsult me by talking about my mother.

Quite frankly, as much as I love my mom, nothing is insulting about "your mom's feet stink" or "your mom is an ugly design project".

This generation needs some originality when it comes to sarcasm. I mean, if you're going to be sarcastic, make it good! Make it memorable; say it like you mean it! (or you don't mean it, whichever is the case)

We don' seek originality, though. We laugh when someone makes a stupid joke and we go on telling them. If you don't believe me, I found an entire website devoted to "stupid your mom jokes" that I will not link to because I can't vouch for its cleanliness.

Also, the phrase "who's your daddy" is another pet peeve of mine. What is about revealing the truth about one's parents? Why would someone who obviously doesn't care inquire about my father?

I'm not ashamed of my dad or who he is. Sure, he's a bit of a footwear enthusiast (he's been dancing around the house today because he just bought his first pair of flip flops), but he's my dad. Even is I didn't like it, I'd be stuck with him.

So, what are the origins of these phrases, these cliches, that bind us all? I am yet to find out.

My mom is an awesome public speaker

I'm sitting in her Song of Solomon teaching right now, and it's amazing. She should teach an FSM class or something. Oh yeah. I'm sitting in it.